Enjoying the Journey

One of my biggest faults and issues in life, is how I handle stress. I'm a go-getter type of person. I like to be efficient, do everything with all my heart, work hard and love harder.

Yesterday as I found myself being completely impatient with the kids and feeling very overwhelmed, I attempted to pull myself away from life circumstances and spend a moment or two really evaluating what was going on.

My oh my, have we lived a life of transition over the last several years. Since Zach was born, we have only gone 6 months without having someone live with us. We've moved, gone to bible school, learned how to live without securities like a job or health insurance or savings. We've traveled out of the country and in it. Then we spent the last year fighting through a hard pregnancy, to get to the next transition in our life... our wonderful Simon.

Now, we are packing up the house again and moving back to PA. Saying good bye to dear friends, to students that have lived impactful moments of their lives with us, to girls whom came to us single and left us married, to a church that has grown by leaps and bounds, and to a lifestyle that has challenged us daily.

Transition...

Unfortunately for me, the adventure of our lives doesn't always measure up to what I feel like I can handle. Stress creeps up in the smallest of ways.

I realized yesterday that its a snowball effect. Something small happens, a normal life circumstance...

One of the boys gets sick, or heck all three of them do. Normal people would just deal with it, but I'm so keyed up that it seems bigger then it really is. Then bills come in, the house is a mess, boxes are adding up, and worries about jobs and the house we are moving into next are lingering in the back of my mind.

What I wouldn't give, to be able to just lay that all down and not worry about it. To walk in true peace and trust, that my God will take care of ALL my needs and that the trials that I endure will make me stronger.

This morning, I woke up determined to walk in peace today. I purposed myself to love and enjoy my children, to appreciate and adore my husband, and to trust that just for today my God would take care of my needs.

Today - He sat me in a green pasture and even led me to quiet waters. He gently worked on restoring my soul. He guided me on a path of righteousness, especially with my boys. Goodness and love followed me today, as I dwelled on the house of the Lord.

It was good.

Posted in: going on in my heart, Here's the Truth on Tuesday, April 20, 2010 at at 7:21 PM