For weeks, I have been pondering this past year, 2007. I've been reflecting on it, considering what God has done in me, through me, and around me. Much has gone on in my family, our children, the people we encounter daily, etc. And in a few weeks, I will turn another year. Time on one hand is flying by and yet, in alot of cases, seems wayyyy too slow.
It's the new year, 2008, and I am about to be 31. That spells R-E-F-L-E-C-T-I-O-N time, to me!!!
So here's three things that I've learned about myself this year.
1. Loneliness brings out good things too.
Yes, the phone is right next to me. And our door is revolving with people in and out. Yet, somewhere deep in my heart I have felt rather lonely this year. Of course, since I tend to wrestle with God, I found myself fighting this loneliness, feeling burdened and even more tired. What I was unable to see until recently, was during that time, two things emerged ~creativity and confidence.
I've spent more time this year, writing, sewing, painting, cooking, now beading, and in general creating something fresh. Each time, I finished a project, I found the load that I was carrying seemed lighter.
If you feel lonely, its easy to try and figure out what might be wrong with you. After I eliminated the ideas of smelling bad, poor conversationalist, or somehow scaring people off, I came to the realization that this is just where God had me.
And then, I began to find out that I like myself. I like who God has created me to be. I like my own funky personality. I like my hair and my clothing style. I like my tastes in decorating and music. I like who I am as a mom. Most of all, I like that I am constantly growing and changing and that I am not perfect.
If I wasn't lonely this year, I would not have found more of who I am. A lack of convenient deep friendships has made me dig deeper into myself. And I'm not so bad after all...
Tune in tomorrow for more of what I learned this year.
In the meantime, I'd love to hear how you've grown this year! Share with me.