Never a Dull Moment
This week I celebrate 17 weeks of this little life inside of me. Tuesday I have my monthly doctors’ appointment and I’ll relish the moment that I hear the fast paced beat of its heart.
I want to put a funny sign over the door to my house ~ Never a Dull Moment. Because for the last three years of my life, I can honestly say that has been what has eeked out of my lips weekly. My life feels anything but ordinarily secure or comfortable.
When I had read the two little lines on the pregnancy stick that deemed us with a new and exciting blessing in our life, I just wasn’t prepared for another rollercoaster of an adventure. Don’t ask me why, because you’d think I would have gotten the hang of it by now. Nothing ever seems dull or boring in our lives.
Morning sickness? Yep, just all day long. Exhaustion? I can’t even begin to explain it. Odd little quirks and sicknesses popping up? Sure, why not? And then the clincher, being told that my body was in the process of rejecting the baby. I was miscarrying.
Of course, if we stick with the theme of my current season of life – Never a Dull Moment. Then you’ll breathe a sigh of relief when you read that within a few days and with the help of modern technology we found that the baby was indeed alive, measuring right on schedule. Praise God.
Days then turned into weeks as I have gone up and down, down and up, with good news, then bad news, then more bad news, then okay news. But the baby was still alive and even though I felt like a human pincushion and wasn’t sure what to prepare myself with, we kept fighting for this sweet little life.
Just this past week, I slowly began to let my guard down. I cried when I needed to and then I cautiously begin to feel excited again. A baby, a sweet child that I have wanted for years may be coming my way. An infant to snuggle with, to nurse, to love and to raise into a godly man or woman. It is my hearts desire laid out on a platter… in front of God waiting to know what His decision is.
Yesterday we moved a dresser into the baby’s room and the glider. Holding back tears, I shared with Cory my little dream of how I wanted to decorate the room in preparation for this child. If it’s a girl or if it’s a boy, I have the room designed in my head and the first and middle names already picked out. I’m already thinking of where I want to place the crib and the cradle that Cory’s grandfather built for us.
It was then that I began to dare to dream again. It was then that I began to have some hope that was not clouded by what ifs. And just a bit of joy began to seep into my heart thinking, things just might work out after all.
After all … it’s really Never a Dull Moment these days!
I want to put a funny sign over the door to my house ~ Never a Dull Moment. Because for the last three years of my life, I can honestly say that has been what has eeked out of my lips weekly. My life feels anything but ordinarily secure or comfortable.
When I had read the two little lines on the pregnancy stick that deemed us with a new and exciting blessing in our life, I just wasn’t prepared for another rollercoaster of an adventure. Don’t ask me why, because you’d think I would have gotten the hang of it by now. Nothing ever seems dull or boring in our lives.
Morning sickness? Yep, just all day long. Exhaustion? I can’t even begin to explain it. Odd little quirks and sicknesses popping up? Sure, why not? And then the clincher, being told that my body was in the process of rejecting the baby. I was miscarrying.
Of course, if we stick with the theme of my current season of life – Never a Dull Moment. Then you’ll breathe a sigh of relief when you read that within a few days and with the help of modern technology we found that the baby was indeed alive, measuring right on schedule. Praise God.
Days then turned into weeks as I have gone up and down, down and up, with good news, then bad news, then more bad news, then okay news. But the baby was still alive and even though I felt like a human pincushion and wasn’t sure what to prepare myself with, we kept fighting for this sweet little life.
Just this past week, I slowly began to let my guard down. I cried when I needed to and then I cautiously begin to feel excited again. A baby, a sweet child that I have wanted for years may be coming my way. An infant to snuggle with, to nurse, to love and to raise into a godly man or woman. It is my hearts desire laid out on a platter… in front of God waiting to know what His decision is.
Yesterday we moved a dresser into the baby’s room and the glider. Holding back tears, I shared with Cory my little dream of how I wanted to decorate the room in preparation for this child. If it’s a girl or if it’s a boy, I have the room designed in my head and the first and middle names already picked out. I’m already thinking of where I want to place the crib and the cradle that Cory’s grandfather built for us.
It was then that I began to dare to dream again. It was then that I began to have some hope that was not clouded by what ifs. And just a bit of joy began to seep into my heart thinking, things just might work out after all.
After all … it’s really Never a Dull Moment these days!
Posted in: on Sunday, August 09, 2009 at at 4:53 PM
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So looking forward to seeing this little dream come true for you. I had no idea all the ups and downs, tho I did know you were sick and really wiped out. Will pray for that little life, to be exactly who and what the Creator intended when HE crafted him or her. Love you!