Enjoying the Journey

Tiny fingers and toes seem to have altered my typical Sunday mornings currently. I'm not sure about the rest of you moms out there, but Sunday morning church services feel somewhat impossible for me these days. It's not that I can't get there. It's what happens WHEN I am there. Usually, Cory and I are trading Simon back and forth, holding him, snuggling him, helping him to either stay asleep or stay quiet. That usually takes up all of worship. When everyone settles down to listen to the message, I'm back in the nursing moms room, feeding my little dude. And inevitably, I'm in a great discussion with another mom. So, nursing and changing his diaper ends up taking a little extra time. By the time I get out to the service, most of the message is over and I'm catching the tale end of it all, by standing in the back bouncing Simon, as he finds a wonderful spot on my shoulder and slips into slumber again.

I am NOT complaining, because I LOVE it. I love holding him and snuggling with him and nursing him and everything that has to do with him! I really do.

The conflict comes when I think about how much time am I really getting with the Lord. I am a firm believer that church is not another club. We don't gather together just to socialize or catch up on the newest announcements. No, when I go to church I am there to corporately worship the God that I love. I am there to be challenged by a message. I am there to pray and encourage others. I am there to be strengthened.

Seasons come and seasons go. These days, I find it difficult to actually get to church and really engage. This morning, Cory and the boys set out for service, while Simon and I stayed home. I turned some worship music on, grabbed my bible and journal and snuggled up with my Simon. I prayed, lamented with the Lord, and then challenged myself in a few readings.

I miss corporate worship on a regular basis. But I need genuine time with my God. A quiet home, with a sleeping baby on my shoulder, a yummy cup of coffee, and some good worship music is the season I am in right now. Instead of getting myself wrapped up in what I am missing, I am choosing to ENJOY the season I am in right now. Some Sunday morning are more authentic and wonderful spent at home with my God.