I am having a bit of a rough day, today. But then again, EJ is having an even rougher day then I.
Two nights ago, EJ woke up with a fierce fever, pain in his head, and problems breathing. It was odd and honestly a bit scary. Praise the Lord, we had some prayer warriors in the house at the time, and all four of us sat around him and prayed fervently for EJ. We saw a huge difference in him, his breathing became more normal and he fell asleep in my arms. The fever did not go. And even though the first battle was won, that night included little sleep.
Yesterday, we battled some more, with the fever. No more pain in his head and his breathing was better but still hard. Many friends prayed with us, over him, or for him. The battle continued on. Last night, while CJ was at church, I almost loaded EJ up and brought him to the ER. He was having such a hard time breathing, and I was beginning to wonder how far should I trust God.
CJ came home and we prayed some more. EJ started to look better and we decided to hang in there.
I took EJ to the Urgent Center this morning. I felt released, not because God wasn't going to finish the work, but more to work on my faith in Him. (That is a whole post in itself, that I still need to work through in my head on.) The diagnosis was croup.
EJ is doing better. His fever is almost completely gone. Which will help him immensely. And I really believe that God is going to finish the work, He began.
One thing that God did show me, was how much trust I put into the medical community, versus Him. And while I waited for hours in the Urgie Center and then got barraged from the Dr. about not having health insurance, paid almost $200.00 for the "diagnosis," and literally almost yelled at the doctor, when he treated me so poorly because I didn't have health insurance, I realized several things. The first is, how badly do I really need a diagnosis? Can't I just trust Him to heal my son, without knowing exactly what He is healing him from? And the "medical community" is just a man, with a degree, who every morning puts his pants on the same way I do. God is bigger and better then that.
In the meantime, we are officially moving into our home tomorrow morning. My apartment is a mess, with much to still pack. EJ is quietly sleeping. And I am feeling the stress of moving, taking care of sick child, dealing with doctors, the busy start of another semester, financial woes, and examining myself and my trust in Him.
I think I need a nap!
Posted in: on Friday, January 12, 2007 at at 2:14 PM